I could well imagine the scene at the towers

No words can describe the horror of Sept. 11. Waking up that morning to the news that a plane had crashed into the World Trade Center still feels like a nightmare.

Having played a firefighter on NBC’s “Third Watch” for a year, I could well imagine the scene at the towers. Seeing the towers burn from my rooftop in lower Manhattan, and watching the endless stream of emergency vehicles screaming toward downtown, I knew what the impulses of these heroic servants were. I also knew very well that not only were the stairwells filled with people fleeing down, but that they were crowded with firefighters going up.
As the first tower fell, my only thought was “they are all still in there, they haven’t left the building.” I knew that if there were people in the towers that the members of the FDNY wouldn’t leave. So I knew that I had just lost tremendous friends and colleagues; friends that I had made on the show, terrific firefighters and police officers. The question I didn’t know was how many.

Days later it became known that the number was 12. Twelve firefighters and police officers who had worked as background actors on the show were killed that day.
Firefighter Tom Foley taught me my first day how not to be knocked over by backlash from the fire hose. I nicknamed Rodney Gillis, a handsome, newly engaged NYPD officer, “movie star.” Now both were dead.

The day was a day of terror, overwhelming loss and mass confusion.
It’s been a strange amalgam of emotions to work on a show that portrays the emergency personnel of NYC during this time. Part of me felt that I should go down “there” but I knew rationally that I wasn’t trained.

I felt so helpless and at a loss. In the days that followed, I realized there were things to do. I gathered my friends and we stood in lines around the block to give blood. Visiting 10 or so firehouses, we delivered salads and socks.
I’ve always felt such gratitude for the opportunity to play a New York City female firefighter. One of the most profound letters I received last fall was from a female firefighter who thanked me for the 27 female firefighters of the FDNY, for giving them a voice through my character.

When the show returned, it was their character and courage that kept us going. Looking back, I don’t think they understood that completely. But they were keeping us all going.
Going back to work the first day was scary. I felt tremendous pressure to portray my character in a way that would do justice to their story, to accurately and honestly portray their heroism.
I wanted people everywhere to know them. I think all of us at “Third Watch” felt a heightened sense of responsibility to do good work in their honor. I would like to think that their service changed all of us in a profound way. I hope we hold on to those lessons.

They say “art imitates life,” but I hope that art can simply begin to reflect the beauty and tragedy we all experience in our lives.
As we said in one of the final episodes last year: “We must never forget. Our job now is to never forget.” Thank a firefighter or cop today. (And the next time you vote, give them a raise. They deserve it.)